Tuesday, April 1, 2014

The Blues?

You don't really have the relief of weekends or the Monday blues when you're a stay at home mom, but yesterday I really did have all the blues. We're talking aquamarine to navy here. I was in my pajamas (which were also blue) with unbrushed teeth until 2pm. This is very unlike me.

Outwardly, it didn't seem like there was a problem, Small Human was behaving himself, it was sunny and warm out, and I don't want for anything. Yet I felt sad, tired, anti-social and irritable. I thought I was just stressed out but I think it might be something more. I don't feel 100% comfortable with divulging this fact to everyone, so please be kind.

Sometimes I can snap myself out of it by laughing at something funny or distracting myself with fun activities, but not this time. I just feel very meh. I feel embarrassed for feeling this way when my life is very good. Only in first world countries do we have the luxury of analyzing our feelings to death like this.

To try to pull myself out of this rut, Noah and I walked downtown, strolled through the Market, took advantage of the 40% off GAP sale, had coffee (me) and snacks (both of us), and I pushed him home in his stroller uphill all the way home. It's my more lazy form of exercise, but it usually makes me feel better.

Tomorrow is another day and hopefully it brings a better outlook on life. Doubtful, since I have a dentist appointment first thing. I'm such a drama queen, no wonder my son's got a flare for the dramatic.

After writing this post, my Small Human cheered me up by ecstatically feeding me a million tortilla chips dipped in guacamole bean dip, and my heart felt lighter and brighter. I usually always find it really cloying when people publicly gush over their offspring by using cutesy, overused metaphors but truthfully, today especially, he is my gift. It's my birthday month, after all.

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