Friday, June 26, 2015

My Heart Is Breaking

It has been pretty evident for some time now that Small Human is no longer a baby. However, he still speaks like a baby and is amused by things a cat would be entertained by, so I figured we were still good and had a while to go before letting go of his littleness.

The first heartbreak came at bedtime, where he no longer wants to be carried into his bedroom, he just walks into his room, gets right into bed after story time, asks for a couple lullabies, and goes to sleep on his own.

I have been spared from this at nap time though, because he still likes to snuggle-sleep on Momie, but it's getting more and more uncomfortable for both of us cause of my ever growing tummy. This afternoon he proclaimed it to be nap time, waved at me holding his Thomas train, and got into his little bed. I just about cried, my heart hurt so much. Kids grow up though, I just didn't anticipate these first few years to fly by quite as quickly as they did.

Today however, I was spared by Time when I heard his bedroom door open, and little feet shuffle out and down the hallway towards me. "Fweep on mumum", said my little boy sleepily, and I happily obliged. Stay little a while longer, my sweet love, Momie's heart can't take it.

Friday, June 19, 2015

Loving & Losing

"'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all" -Alfred Lord Tennyson

I am no stranger to loving and losing. It's true that people can come into your life to enrich it, help you make sense of it, and make it feel worth living. When you encounter these true gems of people, your natural instinct is to hold on tight, because as humans we can be selfish and simply want to make ourselves feel good. The truth is, it should be us that lives for others, they should not live to serve us. That's a hard concept to remember, though.

In 2006 I left my hometown of Montreal for the city of Toronto, a mere 6 hour drive away. I left behind everything I had known, including a lifetime of friends and memories and my parents. As it turns out, Toronto was really good for me, and it eventually led to meeting the love of my life and our wedding in 2010. One week after my wedding, I left my new and beloved city, my single girl life, and my extended family and friends. The friends I made in Toronto are ones I hold near and dear to my heart, people whom I will love forever and who changed my life for the better. It's rare to make friends like that as an adult, I count myself very lucky.

Now we live in Seattle, 6 years for my husband and going on 5 for me. It was pretty lonely at first, but we made due. Once we had a baby, everything changed. I was introduced to a whole new world of mommies and activities, zoo dates, play dates, park dates, baby classes, baby concerts, playgrounds, library story times, it was amazing. I truly didn't think it would ever happen, but I fell in love with yet more wonderful people and their babies. How lucky can one girl get? I have had the pleasure of becoming friends with some of the funniest, fun, smartest, most honest, trustworthy women here.

I'm sad to say that I've had my Seattle heart broken once before, when one of these incredible women moved away. Our babies were born 9 days apart, we had similar birth stories, lived a mere 4 blocks away from each other, and got along famously. But we still talk almost every day, and still laugh and support each other as friends and mamas. Now it's about to happen again and I'm really bracing myself.

Being so far from family is hard, and when we found "The Other Wilsons" as we so lovingly called each other, it was like a funny karmic gift! However, it's now time for them to move on as well and we will miss them dearly. We wish you all the best and good luck on your new life in Nashville! Until we meet again.

Monday, June 15, 2015

The Creation of Memories

I'm not sure if this is a selfless or selfish thing, but as a mother I am trying to create some really fun and happy moments in my Small Human's life. The moment you decide to become a parent, this is the first romanticized thing that occurs to you. You will be responsible for someone's life, their very first early memories, especially in the beginning. You help to contribute to their (hopefully) happy memories of their entire childhood. So much of it is up to you, because it's your job to show them all the cool and interesting things the world has to offer. Don't get me wrong, I'm not interested in manufacturing or forcing happiness, trying way too hard and never living up to my own expectations of what being a good parent is, it's just something I think about.

I've been wanting to take Small Human through a car wash, because I just know he'd get such a kick out of it. (That, and our car has been filthy for a month.) He's been through a few before he was two, but this was before his awareness of machines and moving parts and his new found love for them. When we finally arrived at our destination, he was fast asleep, and I was pretty disappointed. What a silly thing to feel though, in hindsight. Was I making this about me? Checking off a list of happy memories to create? We ended up waking him up, but he woke up on his own when he heard the power washer blast the windows around him with a jet of water. I was right, he did totally love it and wouldn't stop talking about the "car washing machines" and how loud and wet they were, for the rest of the day.

I know the most important thing is for a child to grow up in a household full of laughter and love, discipline and direction, and that I don't have to work so hard to create memories. In my gut I know they will come about naturally just from the day to day happenings, but if it also brings me joy to try and find things he might love, why not?

Life with a toddler can be so life draining and frustrating sometimes, especially now that I'm this enormous, hormone-filled pregnant woman, but I still love being his momie. I have never cared so deeply about anything else I have ever done in my life. It's easy to forget that these days will be my memories one day too. One day, even the worst tantrums will fade to a sepia in my mind. I'd like to remember what was real, and that when stripped of all the motherly stress and worry, I was truly and honestly happy.

Most days while I drink my coffee, he reads quietly

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Pregnancy Skin Care Routine

Blasted dryness! Being of Filipino heritage, I have always been subject to dry skin, especially during the winter. Moving out to the Pacific Northwest has helped a lot with that, but all bets are off when I'm pregnant. I am itchy all the time, and everywhere! Seriously everywhere, including inside my right ear, no joke, and it's summer right now.

Every day, I have to fight to keep from looking ashy and feeling itchy and tight, and a couple weeks ago I'd finally had enough. Kiehl's was having their Friends and Family sale, so I took advantage of it and bought a big bottle of their infamous (and uncomfortably pricey) Creme de Corps Lotion, as well as a small tub of their Creme de Corps Whipped Body Butter. These two products, combined with my homemade face & body scrub, finally helped me to achieve my itch-free skin relief.

The scrub smells scrumptious and moisturizing already, and the lotion is fragrance free and totally non-offensive to my pregnant senses, which is a plus. The whipped body butter is quite heavily scented however, with "soy milk & honey" so I only apply that to my rapidly growing belly and it's not so bad. I'm like a skin commercial if you happen to bump into me after a shower, so dewy and glowy, it's amazing.

As if that wasn't enough, if you can believe it, my nose has even started to crack and bleed from blowing my nose non stop due to pregnancy rhinitis/allergies. The only thing that helps me with that is Vaseline Cocoa Butter petroleum jelly. One dab and I feel instant relief.

What are/were your pregnancy skincare routines like? I'd love to know!

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Still a Rookie

Even after almost two and a half years of being a mum, I pulled a total rookie mommy move. It was raining on Monday morning, and neither one of us felt like walking in the rain to Toddler class, so we took the car. It's barely a 5 minute drive without traffic, so that wasn't a problem, but parking in Capitol Hill can sometimes be a nightmare.

I found parking no problem across the street though, but I didn't think it through because I parked directly in front of the ice cream shop. Big mistake. His little face lit up immediately, thinking momie was taking him for some random, rainy Monday morning treat. Luckily, he enjoys class a lot so he forgot all about it once we got inside.

Going home was a totally different story, however. I had to alligator-wrestle him into his car seat through our two door car while he cried bloody murder for his precious ice cream. Then he chanted "Ice cream! Ice cream!" the entire way home. I'm really glad we didn't have far to go. When we got into the house, I asked him what he wanted to eat for lunch, pizza or a PB&J sandwich, to which he replied in a very serious, serial killer whisper, "Ice cream, mumum".

I laughed so hard, it was really cute, but all of this resulted in him having absolutely nothing for lunch but a cup of milk. The kid really thought he could convince me to give him ice cream for lunch! Oh well. He's napping really well right now, so you win some and you lose some.

Monday, June 1, 2015

Happy June!

have been a very lazy blogger as of late, and I'm not above blaming it on my pregnancy. I'm struggling a bit energy-wise, to keep up with life, but I am managing. My hormones are starting to even out because I am 10,000% less bitchy than I was two weeks ago, and my nausea is starting to wane finally. I would love a taste of this alleged second trimester energy I'm supposed to get, since I only have seven weeks of it left. Maybe this means I'll have a magical unicorn third trimester? Yeah, I'm not holding my breath.

We had a lovely week last week and were graced with some awesome weather towards the end, so there was a lot of park time and balcony time. Thursday included family dentist appointments, and if you know me, you know that I truly love going to the dentist and having my teeth cleaned. Small Human was more interested in spraying water from the waterpik all over the floor, however.

Then on Friday we got to see the baby! OB related appointments used to be so much more fun and relaxing before we had to cart a toddler around with us, but it was still magical for me to see my second son's little face on that screen! He looks exactly like his big brother and I'm completely in love with him already. He's got a perfect heart, big healthy brain, flawless bones, and looks pretty happy and active in there.

On Saturday morning, the little man and I went downtown to Target, the toy store, and Victoria's Secret. As you can imagine, he only had fun in one of these places, and threw a giant tantrum when it was time to go. The toy store downtown has a really cute train table that he is obsessed with, and he also just discovered that they have Thomas the Tank Engine toys there too. His little mind was totally blown when I showed him Cranky the Crane and Diesel 10 (his favourite). Sooo I think we're going to have to find a way to accommodate a train table in our apartment. His Nonna is going to send us some of his daddy's old train set, and I can't wait for him to see it, he's going to go berserk.

I got to have some Me Time on Saturday too, which was very, very, very welcome and relaxing. Sunday morning was a kiddie concert and more park play, a grocery run and some tv watching. Now I am ending it with some cathartic blogging and quality time with my little girl bunny. For once, I'm not stressed out or angry, and life is just grand. I will see you later this week, I promise, but in the meantime, enjoy the first day of June!

A possible career in dentistry? Both his grandpas took an interest! 

Sweet boy in momie's belly

Drawing with daddy

He sees all the Thomas toys up on the shelf!
Growing bigger every day

I have the sweetest facialists in the country!

We discovered this after bedtime on Saturday night

At the Eli Rosenblatt concert

When you're bored in the checkout line at the grocery store...